fuck me up
because I'm tired of waiting for it
I can feel it coming
creeping down the back of my neck
like silent - black - death
pricked from my own skin
and poisoning my brain

i know you're there
i know you're waiting

for the moment when i feel good
when i feel comfortable
then you'll rip it away
all my beautiful illusions
show me it was all lies
the things that i believed in

the universe is angry
i'll never make up for what i've done
drop one
two
two more drops of blood into the bottle that holds me
this spinning sphere of death
and hatred
and misery
it will win out in the end
why am I even fighting?
there's too much of them and not enough of me
thats what you get
when you're not everything
to everyone
they'll fuck you up
fuck you over in the end

whose fault, i wonder
this pathetic dream
this sniveling, cowardly girl that sits in her room
and cries
tears of horror
when she sees the flesh ripped off the bones
of the people she hates so much

she loves them
i hate them
my being is wrought with it, with you, them, everything
and i simply wait
until I get the reason i need
to flee from the treachery
that i know is breeding